With the holidays fast approaching, you may not be looking forward to them if you have a chronic condition. You possibly, may already be feeling guilty or frustrated just thinking about:
• Shopping for your family and having to ask someone else to do it for you
• Being able to attend the events your child is participating in
• Being able to fix dinner or your favorite holiday recipe
• The difficulty in going to your family member’s home for dinner
• Wanting the house nicely decorated but cannot do it yourself
Well to help you with your inner turmoil, here are my three C’s for the holidays:
Communication – Let your family know ahead of time what you can do, what they can expect from you, what you need from them, and make plans with them around your Can’s. If you’re going to another family member’s home for the holidays, they will be very appreciative to know what to expect and it will be easier for everyone and more enjoyable.
Creativity – Get creative! Make new family traditions; new ways of doing things that are fun for everyone. Plan them so your Can’s are met. If you have children, you know how imaginative and creative they can be. Talk to them about your Can’s and see what they come up with.
Compassion – Have compassion for yourself! Realize you are doing the best you can and that it’s okay to only do that and no more! Also, take time to rest and take care of yourself so you can be as healthy as possible.
With a little forethought and planning, you can have a happier, less stressful holiday season.
My Best Wishes for happier, healthier holidays this year!
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
All great ideas, Elaine, even if you don’t have chronic pain! We can all use some simplicity and new traditions.
The first Christmas my kids and I were on our own looked like it was going to be painful or at least weird and different from the Christmases they had known before.
Both had just started snowboarding and their main present was season ski passes. Didn’t leave much money for other gifts.
They said, “well if we don’t have gifts, what are we going to do for Christmas?”
You guessed it: snowboarding!
I was so busy thinking about all of that, I didn’t even plan Christmas dinner and of course, the stores were all closed. Tuna Noodle Casserole was the answer and for several years we had a new tradition: Snowboarding + Tuna Noodle Casserole!
Of course, they’ll remember that tradition forever and I fully expect them to be telling it to their grandchildren!
Cindy
Thank you! I would now go on this blog every day!
BernieR
Great story Cindy!!!
Isn’t it wonderful how we create fun family memories!
I think you will help a lot of people de-stress with this post.
Congratulations!
.-= Doris Helge, Ph.D.´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at =-.
Hi Elaine,
This is a great article and great advice… and not just for those with chronic illnesses, but for anyone who is feeling stress over the holidays. How many times have we heard that the holidays are the most stressful time of the year and that depression hits more often during the holidays. I think your suggestions should be adopted by EVERYBODY who feels holiday stress!
.-= Dave Meyer´s last blog ..Leaders: Are You Measuring Your ROE? =-.
Another thing you can do is to spread the load. Don’t accept that everyone is automatically coming to you, or that you have to be at someone else’s house at a particular time. Negotiate with all parties who brings what, who goes where and when.
There’s no need to miss out on the holidays if you plan in advance. Even with advance planning, though, your particular condition may flare up at just the wrong time. Let everyone know this pssibility beforehand, and have contingency plans in place.
If you have to have your celebration late because you have crashed, so what? If your family and friends are supporting you, they will be flexible. You have to be flexible, why not them too?